A Little Ditty About Jack And Diane

On October 26 we went over to Richmond to EKU's regional arts center to see John Mellencamp in concert. Like many in my generation I am a fairly recent convert to Mellencamp. I remember him early on as John Cougar , country boy from Seymour,  Indiana. He was slow to catch on to the Rock and Roll scene and changed his name to Mellencamp, which is his given name. I've grown to like his somewhat unique style of rock which includes an electric violin and an accordion, which are both pronounced on some of his bigger hits. The opening act for the concert was Carlene Carter, the step daughter of June Carter Cash and Johnny Cash. Her father is the traditional country singer Carl Smith. She sang about eight songs by herself with most accompanied by her guitar and one on an electric piano. One of her stories was when as a child she was out in the yard of the Johnny Cash estate one Saturday morning when an Army Huey Helicopter landed in the back yard and a young soldier jumped out and went to the back door wanting to see Johnny Cash. As it turned out it was Kris Kristofferson, a member of the Tennessee Air Guard who had piloted the chopper in to deliver a song he had written , that he hoped Johnny Cash would sing. It happened to be "Sunday Morning Coming Down" , and the rest is history. Carlene said she was 61 years old, but was a very pleasant surprise. After she played the opening act John Mellencamp came out with a terrific Rock and Roll band and played most of his hits from 30some years. Sandy told me John was in some kind of relationship with Billy Joel's ex , Christy Brinkley. Seems the old girl likes aging rockers. I think that she was the inspiration for "Uptown Girl".I also don't know how Sandy knew about John and Christie, but women just know some things. The concert progressed and he sang the little ditty about Jack and Diane by himself. Actually theaudience sang most of the song with him and did a great job. The audience really got in the swing of things when he sang, "I fought Authority and Authority Always Wins".It seems that the mostly late middle-aged audience had done their share of fighting authority.Perhaps the low point of the concert was when the middle-aged white women started dancing, a spectacle that  is always depressing. White women of that age have no rhythm and make complete asses of themselves. It's always fueled by $6 beer.Then the same group wanted to take endless selfies of themselves and their drunken best girl friends with smart phones as big as I-Pads. They lit up everyone 4 rows behind them, oblivious to the anger and threats from the aggravated spectators .I saw the same foolish white women at a Seeger concert. What is it about middle aged white women and alcohol??The Concert ended with "Cherry Bomb". I give the Concert a B+. I like some of Mellencamp's music a lot more after seeing the concert. I give the drunken white women dancers an F for totally abject behavior.Their dancing is irredeemably bad and a burden on the whole Caucasian race. By the way, what is Beyoncé doing on the CMA awards, with the foul mouthed Dixie Chicks? The Dixie Chicks have way overdone their welcome in the country music genre. They have talent but no one cares about their opinions. They are from Texas, not California.It's almost Election Day. Could it be that this Horrendous period of time is just about over in two days? Either way we lose, but maybe it will end.

Subjected to Insanity

Sometimes I think the United States is unwittingly being used as mass participants in a cruel game of how much the citizens can take in this Presidential Election.Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton. This has to be the most bizarre game in the history of mankind. What kind of system has evolved in American politics that would allow two such unlikable, rude people to face off as our leader?Our country has had its share of scandalous citizens running and winning public offices, but never have we had such a pair of disliked and untrustworthy contenders. It seems like having no morals and a lack of respect for the citizens is now a prerequisite for running for office. Our country was founded upon freedom and pride in our government. All we are hearing is about Trump's tax returns and lack of respect for women, Hispanics, blacks, and Muslims. All we are hearing about Hillary are how half the country are deplorables and about her 33,000 E mails on her private server. Haven't we as a country had about enough of this insane barbs at each other?Neither has the first clue as to how to get our country back as the leader of the free world. The real problem is that the earlier contenders in both parties were no better. Bernie Sanders ,I think is probably the most sincere and likable of all the candidates. Liked by all young voters, he nonetheless wanted to give everything away to the masses. He is a Socialist with a Robin Hood complex. I feel I Like Bernie,yet he is a Don Quixote fighting windmills.I just wouldn't have felt the Burn enough to pull the lever.Cervantes would have felt a comradeship toward Bernie. "Little Marco" Rubio felt he had a lot to offer the country ,but found little support other than Nikki Haley , the 42 year old governor of South Carolina, who incidentally took the place of the philandering ex- governor who inexplicitly would disappear to Argentina at times. Chris Christie seemed to have taken pleasure in clogs in traffic at bridges, and now holds Trump's hand. Rand Paul didn't even score in the game and dropped out. Mitt flirted with the idea but never dropped in. Ted gave it his all but sulled up and went home, a poor loser.He sulked his way back to Texas. Carly Fiorina gave it her all but Trump steamrolled over her and she went to be Ted's running mate,to no avail.Carly is certainly no slouch as a MIT graduate and first female CEO of a Top 20 Company. She is also the first woman to fire 30,000 employees while leading Hewlett-Packard. She took her millions and went home. Jeb Bush had dreams of becoming the third in his family but lost steam and took Brother George's support with him. Paul Ryan, while not a candidate hovered around the peripheries like a little Diva. McConnell did the same, while sputtering around like an old grandmother ,both impotent to stop Trump.This sets the stage where every American is a loser regardless of who wins the election. Hillary promises 4 more years of Obama , which really gives us all something to wait with bated breath .Should Trump win, it's like "What's Behind Door Number 3?"We are about to enter the World's Biggest Reality Show, where there are no winners. There is no precedent for such an important event being hijacked by the two most inept and disliked people in the free world.This is going to be the beginning of an era in American History that could very well effect the entire world's population.I hope that our country can navigate through the next four years ,and that some sensible, caring,and patriotic people will come forward to lead our country. It has been said that cream rises to the top, but in this case other things have floated from the bottom, and they are not cream, if you catch the gist of what I'm saying.The Fifth Estate fawns over Hillary, as well as the Trailer Trash of Hollywood. The rednecks and working class are behind Trump. I will vote come Election Day, but I resent the fact that we have become a part of the world's most cruel reality show.

Santiago

The final stop on our Cuban tour was to be Santiago, the second largest city on the island. Located on the south eastern end of Cuba, Santiago is 542 miles east of Havana and has over 500000 residents. We entered the channel toward the harbor early on Friday morning and was immediately aware of the mountainous terrain surrounding the harbor. In the distance were beautiful rugged mountains covered with tropical forests, and the same cloudless blue sky. Guarding the channel on the steep mountain side was the 16th century Spanish fort, and on the opposite side a stione lighthouse. The ship continued toward the harbor in a tight zig zag course that gradually widened into Santiago Harbor. Again the shore ,like Havana was a scene of power plants and some type of refinery. The burning odors were here as well, and the vintage cars were waiting on shore for photo opportunities. After finally getting docked and secure , the disembarkation process began again . More customs and money changing, and more new Chinese buses awaiting the wide eyed Gringoes.We started out on a walking tour and were shown where Fidel had started his Revolution. The revolution started during Carnival in July,which our guide Jorge told us was the oldest and biggest Carnival in the Americas. He didn't seem, to respect Rio's carnival.Jorge seemed to think there was no finer drinking and time of debauchery than Santiago's Carnival. We were taken on a tour of a drug store and what is a government owned department store, where you can buy anything a household needs, as long as you don't care that there is a waiting time and little options for colors or styles. I think it would be similar to Russian held countries during the height of the Soviet empire.Again the streets were clogged with people standing and talking with little obvious purpose like work. The neighborhoods were primitive in areas away from the port, with mules and horses pulling shaky looking carts. Some of the streets were mainly dust and gravel.  Beautiful old 3 and 4 story colonial masonary buildings are all in a state of decay or dilapidation. All have ornate wrought iron grills and gates to keep people out and protect belongings. The upper stories are festooned with flapping clothes hung out like banners to dry. Many of the buildings have tropical colors painted on details to give an intense mixture of blues and pinks and yellows. It is Shabby Chics poster city.We ate lunch in a wonderful private little pizza parlor owned by an Italian who had married a Cuban woman, one of the only ways to gain Cuban citizenship. For our lunch they served Cuban cuisine, again chicken, pork, and beans and rice. Like Havana the waiters and waitresses wore black presses slacks and snow white starched shirts. They also had a lady troubadour singing during our meal. She was a Cuban version of Tracy Chapman and had cds for sale. After the meal the staff opened up an impromptu bar on the terrace and gave out generous shots of rum. Most of our group wanted to stay with the rum and congenial staff, but Jorge had a schedule and the tour went on. We visited San Juan Hill where Teddy Roosevelt, Leonard Wood , and the Buffalo soldiers kicked some Spanish Ass. Jorge called it the Cuban Spanish War, and gave us a little credit for whipping the Spaniards, but in reality it was Major Parker and 4 Gatling guns that decimated the Spanish army . We whipped the Spanish in Cuba and the Philippines and gave them their freedom. Along the way the USS Maine mysteriously sank in Havana Harbor in July 1898, losing over 260- American soldiers. The Yellow press took up the cause and Admiral Dewey did the rest, with Spain never again regaining its world leadership.San Juan Hill is somewhat under whelming with a bunch of Cuban monuments that are confusing.We then went up to the Spanish fort guarding the harbor entrance and it was perhaps the most amazing piece of architecture and construction on the whole island.The Castillo de San Pedro de la Roca was designed to defend against the original Pirates of the Caribbean , but took two centuries to construct . It is probably the most beautiful Spanish fort ever constructed, partly due to its architecture, and partly due to its location overlooking the approach to Santiago Bay.The final stop on the Santiago tour was a stop at a dance club-bar with a very professional Cuban band. They called themselves the Retirees since the leader was 82 years old. There was dancing , Mojita drinking, and a great time. Jorge danced with the ladies in the tour group

and we headed back to the boat. Santiago became our favorite site on the tour. Like San Francisco, we left our hearts in Santiago.Jorge told us on the end that we should all vote for Hillary Clinton so as to continue the progress between the US and Cuba.That was the only sour note of the whole trip to Cuba.

Cienfuegos

The second stop on our Cuban tour was to be a Southern port named Cienfuegos , which means "A Hundred Fires". The nickname of the city is "The Pearl Of The South", and like Santiago, is one of the busiest ports on the Cuba -South American trade routes. The city itself is much smaller than Havana and has about One hundred and Fifty thousand people. Our guides told us that it is only a three hour trip from Havana to Cienfuegos by bus or car, but it took our ship over a days sailing to reach the southern port because we had to sail west and round the western tip of Cuba and then sail East about 250 miles. The Island of Cuba is around 700 miles long and is 100 or so miles wide. An interesting fact is that Cienfuegos is primarily agricultural and raises sugar cane and tobacco in very fertile soil. Much of the Sugar cane eventually turns into Cuban Rum distilled in the original Bacardi rum distilleries that were socialized by Castro after the Revolution.During the height of colonialism in Cuba there were over 700000 slaves working the huge plantations for the Spaniards. That is more slaves than the United States had previous to the Emancipation Proclamation. The city of Cienfuegos was very much less cosmopolitan than Havana, yet still had very beautiful colonial architecture of Spanish and French influence. It was attacked briefly during the Revolution because there was a Pro-Castro movement against Batista. The morning we were there was very hot with a cloudless blue sky.After walking around the town square the tour guides took us to the town's Opera House for a concert of the town singers, which are funded by the Socialist Government, as are the other artists of Cuba. We were led into the Four story theater and found the performance was already started. the only lighting in the large open theater was spotlights on the stage , and the rest of the theater was so dark you could almost feel it. Along with the blackness was a pervasive heat of at least 120 degrees. our guide told us to go up steps invisible in darkness and find seats we could not see. We finally stumbled up a flight of unlit stairs and felt for empty seats.  After falling all over each other and finding the seats we sat in tropical darkness and listened to a talented group of singers sing in Spanish of traditional and contemporary Cuban songs which would have been very entertaining had we not been in a dark sauna sweating our lives away. They sang"Guatanamara", which was very pretty, yet we finally found our way downstairs thanks to Sandy having a small LED light in her purse. It reminds me of pretty women singing in the pits of Hell to captured souls.We stumbled outside to the bright tropical sunlight ,and  gratefully entered our air conditioned Chinese Bus like the spoiled, pampered,complaining asses that we are. We then drove around the city and went down to their beach and waterfront area where the guide told us the city inhabitants go in the evenings to cool off , drink, and socialize. There was a beautiful hotel there that is very expensive overlooking the water.There were also a couple of beautiful turn of the 19th century mansions that were taken by Castro in  the revolution when their wealthy owners fled to Miami.After a half day tour of the city our bus took us back to the port where we filed past the Custom men and women and boarded our home away from home to start our next leg of the journey to Santiago. A very interesting ritual at sea is the boarding of Cuban pilots who must be aboard your ship as it enters the channels into the ports and who must take you out of the harbor until you are safely on the open seas. There is an international law that all ships entering a harbor of any nation in the world must have a licensed pilot, to guide the ship in and out of the country. This applies to military ships as well as commercial ones and the law is very strictly enforced and the pilot commands the entire ship as long as he or she is on the bridge. That's why there are very few ship incidents while in the channels entering the world's busy harbors.Once past the channel an official orange runabout reading"PILOT"picks him up and goes back to the harbor. The open sea is gorgeous with deep blue waters full of silver flying fish
 gliding above the waves.The setting sun at sea is indescribably beautiful with golds and reds above the blue.Words cannot describe,nor can cameras capture the beauty. I thought that Santiago cannot top what we have seen so far, but I was wrong.

CUBA

In early spring I noticed an advertisement for an educational cruise to Cuba.This was after Obama's historic softening of the freeze in diplomatic relations between the US and Cuba since Castro's seizure in 1959. I have always been fascinated with Cuban history and its relationship with the USA and we talked some friends into signing up with us for the 7 day tour. It is sponsored by Carnival Cruises, but leaves Miami on the ADONIA, which is a much smaller ship of only 700 passengers and 300 crew members. I had always vowed to never take a cruise but this was the best way to see Cuba because you stay onboard at night and tour Cuba during the day.I had read that you don't want to stay in Cuban hotels at this stage because they are still pretty crude compared to American standards , and I personally saw some of the best they offered during the tours and it was Holiday INN circa 1959. The Russians certainly didn't do much to modernize Cuba in the 30 years or so of their r

elationship. The average Cuban is paid $20 a month by the Socialist government and Professionals like Doctors and scientists are paid $40. All medicine and medical care is free, as well as college. You must work for the country for 2 years or your college degree is revoked. A lot of teachers and professionals are quitting their $20 a month jobs to become tour guides and bus drivers because the is a lot of tourist tips coming their way from American tourists. Its amazing that your tour group gets off the ship each day and goes through customs and then boards new red ,white , and blue air conditioned buses imported and partially owned by China. The premise of being allowed to tour Cuba at this stage hinges on it being either as an educational group, or as a commercial venture rarely sanctioned by the US. It was just a couple of weeks ago that the first US airlines were starting to be allowed to land in Cuba. It is somewhat of a surprise as your ship enters Havana Harbor as it looks totally like a modern city with tall buildings and an air of modernism. That quickly fades as the ship winds its way through the channel to the dock and you get closer to the city and realize that it is Miami in maybe 1940. The old cars are there as promised, but there are already yellow taxis picking up tourists. Havana is changing even as we watch. The harbor is surrounded by refineries and utility power plants as well as medium tankers loading and off loading petroleum products. There is a smog haze in the air befitting a city of 2 1/2 million people as well as a constant smell of burning paper or wood. As the ship threads its way to the dock, both sides are lined with Cubans waving and taking photos with their I-phones, yelling"Viva America!"They seem happy to see us.The water in the harbor is probably the dirtiest I have ever seen in the Caribbean, much like they described at the Rio Olympics. Everybody on shore seems happy except the Customs people who stamp your Passport and sign your Visa. It's interesting  that half the Customs officials are Men and half are attractive young women wearing mini skirt uniforms with black hose like from Victoria's Secret. There are medical people who scan your forehead with infra red thermometers . If you have a temp you get further evaluations.Once on shore you get on your bus with a Cuban guide who speaks English and takes you through Havana on a bus tour, as well as assorted walking tours. Havana has 4 major town squares with many historic government and cultural buildings , mostly explained in terms of Fidel Castro and Che Guevara ouster of Fulgencio Batista and the American Mafia in 1959. The bus takes you to Revolution Square where classic cars are parked and you pose in 1955 pink Bel Air Chevy convertibles with the Cuban Driver. You pay him maybe $1 or 2pesos CUC which is Cuban currency for tourists.The guide tells you to only buy Cuban Cigars from licensed stores, because otherwise you will probably buy banana leaves wrapped in tobacco. Americans are allowed to buy $400 worth of cigars and rum. That's all . American currency must be exchanged for Cuban  dollars as you exit customs. You are charged 10%  for a fee. The dollar is about equal to a peso in value but becomes 90 cents after the exchange.American credit cards are not allowed so leave them on board the ship. Your cell phones won't work on land so turn them off when you leave Miami or you will receive enormous roaming charges while you're on board the ship. The ship has WIFI at an exorbitant rate, but what the hell, you're in Cuba living like the USA in 1959.Get used to no cell phone. We survived. Mass transit in Havana are 1950 vintage Ford and Chevrolet flat bed trucks with benches.There are thousands of these coming into Havana every day with workers, but I saw very few people working , mostly standing on street corners talking. I didn't see any loose cats, but there were many flea bitten dogs running loose at will, scratching their mangy hides. The tour took us to two different restaurants in Havana the two days we toured the City. The first was a private restaurant on the upper patio up about 50 steps . The meal was Cuba Cuisine of rice and beans , lobster, sautéed vegetables and chicken or pork. Desert is always some sort of ice cream. It was a very pleasant meal with a Cuban band playing Cuban Music. Those who ate the lobster said it was too salty , an observation of everyone who ate lobster on shore the whole trip. The second day in Havana we ate on the 31st floor of an office building . The food was again about the same. Usually they serve a Sangria which brought mixed reviews.It was interesting that we watched Cuban vultures soaring below us as we ate on the top floor in the restaurant. I felt very safe in Havana, and actually we felt more secure in Havana than in Miami. The Cubans were all very friendly and nice to the Invading Americans. There were the usual scammers wanting to sell you artists' renderings , and Attractive Cuba woman dressed in bright tropical clothing wanted to kiss American men for Pesos but I resisted. I might add that the Cuban women as a group are knock outs. I kept hearing The Black Eyed Peas singing "Latin  Girls"in my mind. We went to the Art Museum , which had a lot of Egyptian and Roman Artifacts. It was interesting that in the American Section there was a life sized Portrait of Henry Clay and one of George Washington. There weren't many Cubans partaking of the art work. It was a Beautiful Museum of marble and Beaux Arts design. After two days in Havana the ship loaded up and sailed around the western tip and headed to the second city on the tour which is a different story.

Snow

It's the day after Valentine's Day , February 15, 2015, and we are facing snow and then flooding.Last year about this time we were facing bitter cold  polar vortecs that eventually dropped our temperatures to 20 degrees below zero Fahrenheit, which is utterly amazing for central Kentucky. Only two weeks ago we had over 12 " of snow fall on a Sunday night , then burn off by Friday in 60" temperatures. I guess it could always be worse but it would have to be of Biblical proportions to top-20 degrees.So this week one can only guess at car colors lurking under layers of road salt applied to our highways. Sometimes I wonder if our friends in Florida miss us as we plod along our daily lives covered in several layers of confining but warm winter clothing. Age has taken the thrill away from the winter snows that used to generate excitement for sleigh rides and snowball fights. Now you can't even make snow cream without thoughts of air pollution and carbon particles in our atmosphere. Now I have to worry about having good tires for traction and maintaining 4 wheel drive.Interstate 75 has been reduced to a giant parking lot the last two storms due to Semis playing bumper tag and jackknifing . Over 3000 travelers spent over 24 hours on the road two weeks ago. At a point there is no place to go , and it's cold and gasoline soon runs out keeping the car warm. The National Guard picked up hundreds and took them to community shelters. All too soon things will return to normal and everyone will be towing campers south for spring break at 85 mph. Every other car seems to be from Michigan or Ontario as they are headed to Tampa or Miami.I have noticed that the tire dealers are selling tires that are made in China,something that I just can't quite trust on my cars. They are about half the price of a new Michelin, yet there is something unsettling in my mind as I contemplate the thin margin of safety at 85 miles per hour on Chinese tires. A new set of Michelin 20" tires will top $1000 , which also troubles my mind. A $1000 set of tires is worth nearly as much as some of my cars.This particular storm we are currently experiencing is Olympia ,I think, which makes it the 15th winter storm of the season.Why must we name everything?So I have never in all my life grown so weary of politics, which like this winter never seems to end. We have taken time out to fight over a deceased Supreme Court Justice's demise. He isn't even buried and the parties are fighting over who will be appointed. There seems to be a shortage of decorum and appropriate behavior amongst our leaders, and yet I forget that never have we had such a collective group of greedy , self serving bastards leading our country. I think kindness, intelligence, and consideration for other people has been deleted as necessary for leading our states and Federal government. Our leaders in Washington are amazingly similar to the fat, greedy, and decadent Senators in the latter days of The Roman Empire.I'm yearning for earlier Florida days and thoughts of the nubile elusive Mermaids ,which I assume pay tribute to King Neptune. I wonder if Neptune's court politicians are as shallow and petty as our own, or can he just poke them in the ass with his trident to make things happen?I often wonder if the Mermaids have stores where they buy latest fashions and nautical baubles, of if they have the equivalent of cell phones to communicate. Maybe they just stick the old conch shell up to their ears and talk. They ride seahorses instead of BMWs and seem to have greenish looking skin which hints to me that they don't have blood like us. Maybe they are descendants of Atlantans and know a lot more than we air breathers. I know they know more than me. I still think about them at times though, mainly on really cold nights. I'm contemplating getting on Face Book because I have a lot of pictures of my great nieces and nephews, but I don't know about this friending BS. I don't want friends popping up from years ago that I like even less as I've grown older. I think I will try to get Sandy to do the nice social stuff on the thing if I decide to pull the trigger. She meets 2 criteria:She is genuinely nice and she can type, both of which I am alien to.I've been reading Thomas Wolf and Look Homeward Angel is really an eye opener. I think Wolf was only 38 or 39 years old when he died and his preoccupation with critics and acceptance are nearly overwhelming . I wonder how he would have matured. I also just read Michael Connellys new novel about Harry Bosch and his half brother , The Lincoln Lawyer. I think the movie people got it right when Matthew McConnehey played the lawyer. I also didn't know McConneheys parents met at the University Of Kentucky. I also don't know how to spell McConnehey.It's off to London and Manchester tomorrow on good tires. No mermaids in either place but some good projects which will help pay bills.Been listening to Gaelic Storm as I cruise back and forth to Tennessee on our weekly trips. The song " I Punched Russell Crow", besides being autobiographical , has interesting overtones.I'm tired of Hollywood sirens and have taken up curing ham and bacon. That's quite a departure for me, and I'm afraid that the next step will be bowling.Everybody but Peter Pan grows old.

State Of Union 2016

Ok, so this is the annual state of my union address, which coincidentally is the night of our President's final State of The Union for the USA. I don't pretend that my state carries any of the weight that emanates from the White House, nor do I feel that any great decisions or comments will be arrived at from my state of affairs. First of all my use of paragraphs and proper grammar has obviously not been a factor during the past year, nor will it improve over the remaining days of my life. I am also aware that my thoughts and beliefs will have no impact on our community, state, or nation, not unlike the true politicians that guide us and our future. Polls show that our national Senators and Representatives are at an all time low for public trust and effectiveness, something they have all earned repeatedly over the past decades. Again I am amazed at the Republican Presidential candidates . This is probably the most inept and self serving bunch that I remember in my lifetime. Well maybe Michael Dukaksis and Willy Horton come close. We have Hillary and The Socialist running for the Democratic seat. The girls over at Planned Parenthood like Hillary or her pantsuits and are donating $20 million for her Campaign. Bill is flittering around the perimeter looking for ways to help his woman . Any way the election of 2016  pans out will be more of the same. Our stocks are ready to drop out of sight again and Red China is on the ropes. North Korea's Pillsbury Dough Boy says he set off a hydrogen bomb., and the dumb-assed Iranians have captured 10 American Sailors on the day of Obama's State of the Union Address. Are the Iranians that dumb , or are they just incredibly unlucky and inept ? Iran capturing 10 American Sailors shows a very short memory in world events. Seals are Navy. That wasn't Avon calling on Osama Bin Laden. You dumbasses need to take a deep breath and remember Iraq and its famed Republican Guard. Warthogs have a good track record on Middle Eastern elite soldiers. Our own little piece of the world is doing as well as to be expected. Gasoline is down to $1.65 in Knoxville, and politicians are crying big tears because road usage taxes on gasoline is way down. Now they want to raise taxes to pay for road repair. The Powerball lottery went up to $1.5 Billion for tomorrow night and everyone is making secret pledges to help the world if they could only win. The chances are 1 in 292,000,000 for a person's ticket to be drawn, about the same odds that Rand Paul will become President, or that Kentucky will have a winning football team. Stoops fired some coaches and hired one new one for $625,000 a year, and another for $400,000. That is total insanity paying some dumb jocks that kind of money to help Kentucky have a losing season. My brilliant idea is let some junior college and high school coaches take turns coaching UK football. They would do it for free just to be seen on the sidelines wearing UK caps, and I'll bet they would win as much as these high paid nimrods that Barnhart keeps bringing in. Eastern Kentucky has huge unemployment because of Washington killing coal, and UK keeps building athletic Taj Mahals. David Bowie died yesterday and I will miss him. It's like he was a part of my generation, and those of our age sense our own mortality when a fixture like Ziggy Stardust passes on. Speaking of mortality a recent trip to the emergency room cost me almost $600 for a MD to tell me that I was ok and that there was nothing wrong with me. That's almost equal to a new Offensive coach for UK. For my clients who think I'm expensive the Doctor saw me for 15 minutes and charged the equivalent of $2400 an hour, topping the 6 stitches in my thumb last year that cost $1800. Another debacle the past year was when my Doctor's nurse practitioner gave me a hearing test that consisted of her going to a corner of the exam room, covering her mouth, and whispering while I was across the room with my finger in one ear, looking in a corner and waiting expectantly for a  sound to reach my ears. A sound that never came. The Gestapo nurse failed me for my hearing test, something that didn't surprise me. I hear what I want to hear; I'm just sorry I didn't live up to that sociopath's expectations. Alabama beat Clemson, something that doesn't mean much to me, and a private company sent a rocket into space and the brought it back to earth and landed in one piece, something NASA hasn't been able to do. I guess they're not the only rocket scientists on the block. We went to Chicago and drove, since it's about as fast as flying considering trips to and from airports. We saw a monster field of wind powered generators in Northern Indiana. Research says there are over 600 of the things in the area. They were pretty impressive. We happened to be on the sidelines of the march because of the police killing of a young black man. We watched it on Randolph Street as we were going to a theater. It seems our hero homophobe Kim Davis is attending Obamas Speech with her attorney. Now won't that make some noise in Washington? Does anyone understand this Golden Globe mayhem and a bunch of foul mouthed actors and actresses? Ricky Gervais needs some kind of lessons in good behavior. Is this what we have come to expect of entertainment, and haven't we really had enough of Star Wars to last us a lifetime. Han Solo and Princess Leia have gotten old. Give the franchise up. Sean Penn cannot talk literately so why does Rolling Stone Magazine pay him to interview a drug lord? It's a confusing world out there for people like me. We were in San Antonio between Christmas and New Years and saw the Alamo. The city downtown and the river area was neat. I can't say as much for the food. I never ate as much red rice in all my life. Don't expect to go back to San Antonio, just like Davy Crockett didn't return. My world is fine and I'm happy to still be here and with a good amount of business for my company. Left Knoxville today, number 4 in line for take off on I-75 runway, and touched down 2 and 1/2 hours later in Mount Vernon. Passed a bunch of snowbirds headed to Florida and had unlimited visibility all the way home. Life is good except for occasional hearing faux pas.