A Busy Place Indeed

Well, friend Dave won his race for magistrate here in Lincoln County, and he and his partner Big John try to operate a business here in the middle of Stanford, Kentucky. I say try because it seems their office has become the hot spot for all the movers and shakers to congregate. Before the election friend and foe would meet there under often ,uneasy truce to get election news. Now that the election is over these people are still coming by and making use of the facilities. What's more, there is an ever growing legion of malcontents that drop by to gossip. Dave seems to draw these citizens like honey attracts flies. I have seen the past mayor there more often than Dave. He seems to grow scarce as the doughnuts decline. I was trying to give Dave advice for his election ,and quite frankly that was met with limited, or no success. Dave never wanted to tell the public about the short comings of his opponents;quite the opposite, he wanted to be nice to them. Trying to guide any facet of Dave's life is akin to keeping blacksnakes in a shallow bowl. Dave even wrote a nice letter in the paper praising his vanquished opponents. He needs to read "The Prince" by Machiavelli , but Lord help him, it would need to have illustrations to keep his attention.The crew has gone to NYC with Dave several times ,and he is constantly making exciting things happen. There was the time in the Port Authority that Dave got into an impromptu Doo-Wop concert with a toothless panhandler wanting money. He and Dave sang a song and the Port Authority people nearly ran us all off.Woody, being the tight wad, was singing in the background because he felt the panhandler would ask him for money. Woody is famous as the only person to view the Radio City Christmas show completely covered in sugar from white doughnuts. Back to Dave he bonded with Mr. Lee ,a doubledecker tour bus driver who seemed to have dents in improbable places on his bright red bus.Dave also felt obligated to tell about Tim and Rita eating weird things in China Town, something I have observed on occasion myself. I saw Timmy eat Conch fritters, conch burgers , conch chowder, and conch pasta while in the Bahamas. I didn't see them eating those gross ducks that you see hanging naked in China Town , you know the ones with the gangly neck three feet long , proudly on display behind the dirty plate glass windows. While in New york Dave does not like to walk, and needs frequent rest, something about chaffing and the need for Gold Bond. Once in NYC we all passed within touching distance of Slick Willy Clinton . Dave was beside himself as Clinton has to be his true political icon. He is the only mature adult in his right mind that confessed, and even bragged about going to Arkansas with the express purpose of visiting the Clinton Library. Dave also talks a lot to everyone and buys Chapstick by the case. We have a photo of him applying the slimy balm to his little blue lips ,the Statue of Liberty standing proudly behind him.Dave in all fairness is almost like family as we have been partners on real estate , and have known each other a long time. When we would work on a shared lake cabin, Dave would don a sweat band and curse me because I would get paint or caulk on the tools. He would then disappear for 3 hours on the guise of cleaning the tools. While he was gone I would finish the job. Now do you see why he is a successful politician?He is a idea man , something that evidentally goes back to his days with IBM. Last summer he mentioned that his tractor hadn't been started for nearly a year. I told him I could start it and he said I couldn't. Well I did in about half an hour and he said it was a freak thing and I was "lucky". You know the blind pig and nubbin of corn syndrone. I think Dave is going to do a good job as magistrate because he was previously a school board member. I bought a calf at a school fall festival in an effort to help Dave. It worked because he won. I guess that in the world of politics there have to be politicians and their strategists.Trouble is Dave doesn't listen to advice. Crawdad won in Clay County and my friend won in Lincoln. As William Tecumseh Sherman once said"War is hell!"